Once again, we have arrived at another milestone. A mandatory and objective milestone that will unfortunately and undoubtedly beyond certainty include a totally different post from Day 1500 and a nearly identical post from Day 1400. I don’t know about you, but with it being the day after Thanksgiving, the LAST thing I want to do is spend the next 3-5 hours constructing a profoundly monumental and redundant display of my writing prowess.
I am sure that you are all aware of how things will transpire. (Another exciting redundancy as usual, but it’s still me from last time! The very same me from the 1500th entry! You don’t believe me, do you? Well, go back and read the 1500th entry and then go and tell me who’s lying. And while we’re on redundancies, how much longer is he going to recycle this piece of rubbish? I’m all about saving the environment, but recycling this for the fourteenth time in a row? My, what a milestone! I do need to applaud for your originality…if you had any! This is getting ridiculous! There hasn’t been anything original since entry 1000! Oh well. I need to acknowledge his busy life, as I am quite busy myself, re-narrating this over-narrated narration… For now, we will continue with this cheaply contrived recycled piece of milestone rubbish, rife with wit, dry humor, satire and sarcasm. Smashing! I don’t think that I will change a thing! Although I did change “1500th” to “1600th” and “thirteenth” to “fourteenth” but now we’re just nit-picking, aren’t we? And while we’re at it, why don’t we recycle almost everything in this entire post? Wait! What I just included was new! So much for sticking to my plan…*sigh*) I will leave an introspective entry and then shift my point of view to first person. (Blah blah blah. Redundant again! REDUNDANCY WARNING! How many more times are you going to recycle this? Wait! I’ve said that already! Well it’s a good thing that I have included that redundancy warning! Otherwise, you would not have been forewarned of said redundancies. What? Did you really think that I was going to forget about it? I remembered! Go me! I rock!) I would then provide a predictable reaction from my Muse’s intended absence.
In a sheer attempt at humor, I redundantly acknowledge the composition of this entry. How I talk about this being another milestone, and that this is just a slightly cheap reconstruction of an entry made 500 days ago. (Not quite. I made some subtle changes and included a note to the reader to reread the 1500th entry which would provide a basis of proof that I am the same narrator that narrated 600 days ago.) How original! You would have to be exhausted to pull off something like that! How I am aware of how things will transpire. How I would leave an introspective…wait! This is getting too redundant, and is on the brink of being extremely absurd and ridiculous. Is it too late to start over? (Genius! Considering that you already typed the first two paragraphs, I would just delete them. Just be sure to save my interjections. They’re pure gold, I tell you! Nevermind…You kept them…) With that, we will press on.
Blah blah blah…Long profound…wait! This is redundant! Wasn’t this mentioned in day 1500? We know what happens next already. The overdone exposition about the Muse and why she is not here, approaching the tower (Yes. This tower is different from the one that you saw in Day 1500. It always is! It’s different every 100 posts!) Let’s avoid the redundancy about being redundant, shall we?
But, breaking away from the overly astute sarcastic narrations that get more and more repetitive and redundant with the passing of each 100th post, I notice that this tower is… different. Yes. The tower is a little bit taller (About 100 stories taller, to be exact! My are we smart!), but just to be sure. We will have a look inside and see…
Time to recycle some text from my previous entry, with some subtle edits to make it resemble something slightly different, with the attempt of sounding original and new, since these milestone posts would be boring without that. (I’m all for originality! Let’s be brave! Let’s make something slightly different so that no one will ever notice!)
After standing there for a while, I finally entered through the door. Sure enough, the same field was there. (We should really change the scenery a little bit. Maybe in a later one, perhaps? But this is entry 1600! Maybe we should change it soon…) I was surrounded by the same lush greenery as before. (The greenery was so green that Kyle was overjoyed with ecstasy from the overwhelming greenness.) Clovers and wildflowers. Yellow, orange, and red leaves. A sea of color. Nothing was different from what I experienced 100 days ago. (Except for everything else in this entry that I changed so far. My, am I on a roll today!)
The colorful luminescent sea led to a rather tall structure that sat far in the distance. A tall structure that looked even taller than before. Again, this was getting too predictable, having already experienced this before. And quite redundant. Every 100 entries, the tower’s a little bigger. We get it.
The tower looked like a skyscraper that a giant would live in. An ornately decorated office building – for women. The pink and white accents ran up and down the gold-adorned structure. The diamond-studded glass had a pink tint to it. (Oh please! The designer can only think of the ladies, can’t she? Well, I never!)
“A giant pink office building,” I said to myself. “Can’t my Muse be any more original?”
Let’s cut to the chase, and find out if this tower really is different.
I got attention of the same receptionist who sat there, typing 100 days back.
“So, is this the same Tower of Muses as before?” I asked her, just to make sure. (Oh, come on! You ask her that every single time! Shouldn’t you know the answer already?)
My Muse shook her head again and smiled. “No, silly! This tower is a little different. And there’s a teleporter thingy that will take you to the 1501st floor!”
I nodded, with a slight grin on my face. And this was mainly due to the deja vu. “And this floor is still…”
“Floor 1,” she recited. “ExperiMENTAL. Tee hee…”
And of course the Dark Muse, which was then a bad idea, was just beginning to affect my Muse at this time… (*sigh*) ”Thank you,” I told her, proceeding forward to the mysterious portal that sat past the white service desk just before the elevators.
Upon entering the portal, she was right. I entered a new room, which resembled a different lobby. But this lobby had no exit, since this was the 1501st floor.
Before I could move another inch, I was stopped by a telepathic voice.
Kyle! This area that you are in is a pocket dimension based on the Tower of Muses that I created. Due to my enormous size, I had to create a smaller version of this land and tower just for you. I am currently resting, and I’m the size of 10,000 universes. You would never be able to traverse the actual size of the tower, let alone my own bedroom. As you saw this morning, your universe was safe. I recreated it, along with the multiverse that I now live in. When you get to the 1600th floor, you will see a scaled down holographic version of myself, for my actual self is far too big for you to actually see. I am enjoying my rest very much, and will allow you to return to your exploration…
My Muse can talk to me while she’s sleeping? That’s weird.
I had to borrow your One Privilege to restore everything. I did return it to you. Don’t worry!
Okay. Moving right along…
Approaching a pink colored service desk, I saw a different Muse sitting there. But she wasn’t typing. In fact, she looked up right after I got to this floor. It was only a split second that I saw her typing…
“Welcome, Kyle.” she announced. “You are on the “Growing Pains” floor. This floor is one of my favorites, since it captures who I am, 99 days ago…”
I nodded, and looked at the elevators that were past her desk. “I would like to go to floor 1600 now.”
At this, my Muse frowned. “Why? There are so many good floors!”
I advanced further to the elevators. I then sighed, and quite deliberately broke the fourth wall. The overly redundant redundancies have reached their limit for this post! Would you really want me to actually pick 6 to 8 random floors and stop on them? Sorry. It’s not going to happen this time, either. If you really wish to hear my discussion on the floors, you can visit any one of them by clicking on the links near the bottom of this post. Okay. If we don’t visit them, perhaps we should do this instead. I will briefly recap some of my favorite floors, after I have taken a few minutes to determine what they are.
There. After several minutes of reviewing all 99 entries, thinking and making a much needed edit over the older text, I have my list. It’s right here! I have it on my lap. Let’s see…I will put this in list form so that it will be easier for you to read. My favorite floors are:
Floor 1505 – Total Eclipse
In this one, my area experiences a total eclipse…well, sort of. About 70%, actually. Can you handle the brightness? Read this one, but use a welding mask when you do. And DON’T LOOK AT THE SUN!!!
Floor 1506 – The Calm After the Storm
Why did I pick this one? It actually has little to do with the title. My Muse comes to terms with her daily growth spurts and begins to enjoy her new cycle just a little bit too much. What do I mean? Check this one out, and be careful! Get her attention or she might accidentally step on you!
Floor 1507 – Finally Home…
Things take a turn for the worse when the Dark Muse decides to pay my giantess Muse a visit. And we all know what happens whenever the Dark Muse is involved. Take caution when you read this. It’s a fun and really really big read, tee hee!
Floor 1510 – Chicago Wedding
The highlight here is my cousin’s wedding. I go down with my family and grandparents to witness the best day of his life. What can be better? Maybe it was your wedding day. Read this, and try not to cry, if you’re the one that usually cries at weddings.
Floor 1517 – Saturday Sushi
While the sushi was good, the story arc isn’t. Things worsen when the Dark Muse returns even more powerful than ever. Did I mention that she had a borrowed One Privilege? Read this, and be careful. She might store you with her other toys!
Floor 1523– Friday Respite
The plot thickens when the Dark Giant Muse begins treating earth like a toy. There is more exposition with Remedy and the plot is revealed to stop the Dark Giant Muse. How will she be stopped? Read this one and find out.
Floor 1527 – Tired Tuesday
Things reach the tipping point when the Dark Giant Muse attempts to outgrow the universe. But fortunately, an unexpected visitor saves the day? Who is it? Remember the clues and read this one. Did it have something to do with a thing being borrowed? Hmm…
Floor 1551 – Living Large
In this one, my Muse has a little bit too much fun showing off her growing obsession with being a giantess. At this point, she can easily fit earth in her living room. Her obsession with growing bigger and bigger has me has me a little annoyed at this point. How does she show off? Read this one, and PLEASE remind her not to move the earth into her living room.
Floor 1552– A Different Place
What happened? Somehow, the Dark Muse acquired her own privilege and created her own universe that she calls the “Teeheeverse”. Considering that our universe can easily fit inside it, things get sticky in a Teeheeverse full of creatures all bearing the Dark Muse’s likeness. If you don’t remember this universal pandemic, trust me. You didn’t miss anything. Check out this read and get the full account.
Floor 1553 – LEGO My Ninjago Movie…
The story arc is put on hold so that I can see the next LEGO movie. Check it out, and say hi to La-lloyd for me!
Floor 1558 – Friggatriskaideka…what?
Superstitions and story arc progression bundled into one amazing entry. In this one, I use the Master Key in my attempt to stop the Dark Giant Muse and her Teeheeverse. Am I successful? Read this one, and don’t forget your four-leaf clover or your lucky rabbit’s foot.
Floor 1566 – Another Break…
In this one, my Muse gets so big that she needs to talk to me telepathically. How does this exchange go? Check out this read, and good luck finding my Muse. Did I mention that she’s 100 light years tall now?
Floor 1568 – Monday Mole Day
In this one, I nerd out and discuss Avogadro’s Number, and the wonderful day associated with it. Moles are fun! Moles of all kinds! Whack a mole or use Mario to take out Monty Mole! Go ahead and read this, but don’t forget the chips and guacamole.
Floor 1572 – Odyssey? Yessy!
Another wonderful game has finally come to the Nintendo Switch. In this one, I talk about my purchase of Super Mario Odyssey, a game that could very well be one of the best Mario games of all time. A wonderful song, a vast world full of exploration, and an amazing entry where I discuss all of this. Plus, I use Cappy to have fun with my Muse. A definite must read. And don’t forget to sing along!
Floor 1579 – Friday at Last…
In this entry, the Dark Giant Muse is back? And then she’s gone again thanks to a little…help. Who is the helper this time? I’ll give you a clue. It was not the Master Key this time. Check this one out, and see the exciting finale to the Giant Muse story arc.
Wow! It looks like I had exactly the same number favorites as last time! Maybe I should’ve expanded the list. But it’s too late now. Onward to the 1600th floor…
My Muse, having heard the whole conversation, grinned.
“It’s amazing how much you know about those floors!” she told me. “Especially since you haven’t even visited them…”
“Oh, I don’t need to…” I told her. “I lived them!”
To that, she responded with a satisfied nod, and I proceeded to the elevators. I then pressed the up button a few times. Where are the elevators? With this many, I would think that at least one would be ready for me! A few seconds later, I entered the first elevator door that opened. It just happened to be the one next to me.
I entered the elevator and pressed the 1600 button. Moments later, the doors closed.
Several moments passed. At this point, Kyle decided to be a little more unoriginal and once again reused some material from the previous milestone entry. Perhaps he’ll make it a little different so that they’ll never notice. Just enough changes to throw off the audience. How lazy of him! Can’t he get his brain thinking of any more original ideas? But Kyle would have none of that. He is just as determined to bring this fifteenth milestone post to an abrupt end. The good old recycled zinger. They’ll never notice! Unless the narrator reminds them…
Finally, moments later, the elevator arrived at the 1600th floor.
A little like the 1500th floor before it, this floor was an enormous room, lavishly decorated. A desk sat in one corner and a king-sized bed sat in the other, which was one fourth the size of the bed that was in Entry 1000. Pretty much the same room as the 1500th story, the 1400th story, the 1300th story, the 1200th story, the 1100th story, the 9ooth story, the 800th story, the 700th story, the 600th story, the 500th story, the 400th story, the 300th story, the 200th story, and the 100th story before it, only the room was the same size as the 1500th story, 1400th story, 1300th story, 1200th story, 1100th story, 900th story, 800th story, 700th story, 600th story, 500th story, 400th story, and 300th story and the bed was light blue.
Oh! We agreed not to meddle with the following paragraph! As much as we want to, we can’t. It just wouldn’t be right…
And on the bed laid my Muse. She was in a hologram and fast asleep, with a note attached to her. It didn’t surprise me that she was sleeping, considering that creating this tower probably took so much out of her. Now I’m going to guess that the note will mention that the computer in this room will have this entry already typed. That even includes the later parts that you haven’t seen yet! Am I right? And this further adds to the redundancies that exist in this post already!
Attached to her hand was a note. And this is what it said:
To my master,
I made this tower for you and me. This is to honor your hard work and dedication for another 100 days of hardship, bringing the total up to 1600. Thank you for your dedication to keeping this project going daily. If you look at your computer, the last entry is already written. I am still forever grateful to your kindness, your dedication to saving me and your gratitude.
No! I will not settle for just a hologram. I would like to go to the actual room.
Kyle, I am the size of 10,000 universes. There is no way that you will ever be able to see all of me with just your two eyes!
I don’t care. I want to see you as you are. And besides, I have the One Privilege! Don’t you think that I can manage? To the REAL 1600th story! One Privilege, ENGAGE!
*teleports to the actual 1600th story*
Whoa! Even though I’m right next to her bed, I am many light years away from her!
Kyle, I warned you. My size is far beyond what you are able to see. I can see you, but you can’t see me…
Oh, I can see you just fine! All of you, actually…And don’t you have something that belongs to me?
Don’t worry. They’re just an enhanced Master’s Privileges. You still have your One Privilege. And wow. It’s amazing that you can see me.
It’s kind of neat. Imagine binoculars that are able to span over 10,000 universes. That is my range of vision right now. You are quite enormous, and I’ll leave you to your rest now.
I then looked next to the bed and noticed a directory which was much like the 1500th floor, the 1400th floor, the 1300th floor, the 1200th floor, the 1100th floor, the 1000th floor, the 900th floor, the 800th floor, the 700th floor, the 600th floor, the 500th floor, the 400th floor, the 300th floor, the 200th floor, and the 100th floor before it. However, this was the directory for the Tower of Muses, only it covered only the next 100 floors. I looked at the directory.
The Tower of Muses – Directory – Floors 1501-1600
Floor 1501 – Growing Pains Floor 1502 – Fun Friday Floor 1503 – More Saturday GoodNES… Floor 1504 – Sunday Start Floor 1505 – Total Eclipse Floor 1506 – The Calm After the Storm Floor 1507 – Finally Home… Floor 1508 – Polar Opposite Floor 1509 – A Different Friday Floor 1510 – Chicago Wedding Floor 1511 – Greetings from Tinley Park! Floor 1512 – Manic Monday Floor 1513 – Open up and Say AHHHHHH! Floor 1514 – Green Haircut – Brief Wednesday Edition Floor 1515 – Thursday Brief Floor 1516 – Friday Chex Mix Floor 1517 – Saturday Sushi Floor 1518 – The Countdown Begins… Floor 1519 – Labor Day NESday Floor 1520 – September Toast Floor 1521 – Whensday Floor 1522 – September Prelude Floor 1523 – Friday Respite Floor 1524 – Saturday Start Floor 1525 – Short Sunday Floor 1526 – A Day That I Still Never Forget Floor 1527 – Tired Tuesday Floor 1528 – Right in the Middle Floor 1529 – The Day Before Friday… Floor 1530 – TGIF Floor 1531 – More Sun… Floor 1532 – Saturday: Part II Floor 1533 – A Good Start Floor 1534 – Time for Inspiration Floor 1535 – It’s Over… Floor 1536 – Summer Outro Floor 1537 – Fryday NESday Floor 1538 – Saturday Sketch Floor 1539 – Time to Write Floor 1540 – More Writing… Floor 1541 – Last Day of Summer… Floor 1542 – Back to Fall… Floor 1543 – A Different Thursday… Floor 1544 – 2:00 PM Floor 1545 – The Weekend Begins… Floor 1546 – The Weekend Ends… Floor 1547 – Monday GoodNES – Fall Edition Floor 1548 – Green Haircut – Fall Finale Floor 1549 – Two More Days… Floor 1550 – It’s Coming… Floor 1551 – Living Large Floor 1552 – A Different Place Floor 1553 – LEGO My Ninjago Movie… Floor 1554 – Plenty of Time… Floor 1555 – Dreamy Tuesday Floor 1556 – Another One Down… Floor 1557 – Thursday Failure Floor 1558 – Friggatriskaideka…what? Floor 1559 – Another Weekend… Floor 1560 – Another Sunday… Floor 1561 – A Change of Plans… Floor 1562 – Another Toast… Floor 1563 – Wednesday Brief Floor 1564 –Hurry Up, Friday! Floor 1565 – Friday’s Here… Floor 1566 – Another Break… Floor 1567 – Worship Night… Floor 1568 – Monday Mole Day Floor 1569 – Tuesday NESday Floor 1570 – Two More Months… Floor 1571 – An Earful… Floor 1572 – Odyssey? Yessy! Floor 1573 – Pre-Halloween Weekend Floor 1574 – Quick Finish Floor 1575 – Halloween Checklist Floor 1576 – Trick or Treat?! Floor 1577 – On Fumes… Floor 1578 – Another Friday Prelude… Floor 1579 – Friday at Last… Floor 1580 – Weekend Wrapup Floor 1581 – Breakfast with my Relatives Floor 1582 – Green Haircut – Fall Finale: Part II – For Realz This Time! Floor 1583 – Stupid Update! Floor 1584 – Smooth NES… Floor 1585 – Thursday Meeting Floor 1586 – Productive Pay Day Floor 1587 – Shivering Saturday Floor 1588 – More Shopping… Floor 1589 – NES Day Shopping Floor 1590 – Phew! Floor 1591 – Wrapping up Wednesday Floor 1592 – Old Fashioned Pizza… Floor 1593 – On a Roll… Floor 1594 – Five Days Until the Holidays… Floor 1595 – Saturday: Part II Floor 1596 – Marvelous Meeting Floor 1597 – Pre-Thanksgiving Toast Floor 1598 – Thanksgiving Eve Floor 1599 – Happy Thanksgiving! Floor 1600 – Shop Till You Drop Floor 1600 – Tower of Muses: The Sixteenth Ascent
The high today is going to be 54 degrees and the silver lining is having this 1600th post made.
To all of you who have ever completed a major milestone, I hope that you all have a fantastic day.
Just like entry 1500, she’s right! The entire entry is typed (although it’s giant sized in this world…! And there’s that message at the end! Aw…How cute. I don’t understand how a narrator got into my post. Oh well…
Now I’ll…What’s going on? Just like before! It’s happening once again! On the bed! My Muse is flashing…