Once again, we have arrived at another milestone. A mandatory and objective milestone that will unfortunately and undoubtedly beyond certainty include a totally different post from Day 1800 and a nearly identical post from Day 1700. I don’t know about you, but with it being Thursday and me being really busy with my new job, the LAST thing I want to do is spend the next 3-5 hours constructing a profoundly monumental and redundant display of my writing prowess.
I am sure that you are all aware of how things will transpire. (Another exciting redundancy as usual, but it’s still me from last time! The very same me from the 1800th entry! You don’t believe me, do you? Well, go back and read the 1800th entry and then go and tell me who’s lying. And while we’re on redundancies, how much longer is he going to recycle this piece of rubbish? I’m all about saving the environment, but recycling this for the seventeenth time in a row? My, what a milestone! I do need to applaud for your originality…if you had any! This is getting ridiculous! There hasn’t been anything original since entry 1000! Speaking of which, entry 2000 is just 100 entries away! Surely he’ll have something original for that, won’t he? Oh well. I need to acknowledge his busy life, as I am quite busy myself, re-narrating this over-narrated narration… For now, we will continue with this cheaply contrived recycled piece of milestone rubbish, rife with wit, dry humor, satire and sarcasm. Smashing! I don’t think that I will change a thing! Although I did change “1800th” to “1900th”, “sixteenth” to “seventeenth”, and mentioned the upcoming 2000th entry, but now we’re just nit-picking, aren’t we? And while we’re at it, why don’t we recycle almost everything in this entire post? Wait! What I just included was new! So much for sticking to my plan…*sigh*) I will leave an introspective entry and then shift my point of view to first person. (Blah blah blah. Redundant again! REDUNDANCY WARNING! How many more times are you going to recycle this? Wait! I’ve said that already! Well it’s a good thing that I have included that redundancy warning! Otherwise, you would not have been forewarned of said redundancies. What? Did you really think that I was going to forget about it? I remembered! Go me! I rock!) I would then provide a predictable reaction from my Muse’s intended absence.
In a sheer attempt at humor, I redundantly acknowledge the composition of this entry. How I talk about this being another milestone, and that this is just a slightly cheap reconstruction of an entry made 800 days ago. (Not quite. I made some subtle changes and included a note to the reader to reread the 1800th entry which would provide a basis of proof that I am the same narrator that narrated 900 days ago.) How original! You would have to be exhausted to pull off something like that! How I am aware of how things will transpire. How I would leave an introspective…wait! This is getting too redundant, and is on the brink of being extremely absurd and ridiculous. Is it too late to start over? (Genius! Considering that you already typed the first two paragraphs, I would just delete them. Just be sure to save my interjections. They’re pure gold, I tell you! Nevermind…You kept them…) With that, we will press on.
Blah blah blah…Long profound…wait! This is redundant! Wasn’t this mentioned in day 1800? We know what happens next already. The overdone exposition about the Muse and why she is not here, approaching the tower (Yes. This tower is different from the one that you saw in Day 1800. It always is! It’s different every 100 posts!) Let’s avoid the redundancy about being redundant, shall we?
But, breaking away from the overly astute sarcastic narrations that get more and more repetitive and redundant with the passing of each 100th post, I notice that this tower is… different. Yes. The tower is a little bit taller (About 100 stories taller, to be exact! My are we smart!), but just to be sure. We will have a look inside and see…
Time to recycle some text from my previous entry, with some subtle edits to make it resemble something slightly different, with the attempt of sounding original and new, since these milestone posts would be boring without that. (I’m all for originality! Let’s be brave! Let’s make something slightly different so that no one will ever notice!)
After standing there for a while, I finally entered through the door. Sure enough, the same field was there. (We should really change the scenery a little bit. Maybe in a later one, perhaps? But this is entry 1900! Maybe we should change it soon…) I was surrounded by the same lush greenery as before. (The greenery was so green that Kyle was overjoyed with ecstasy from the overwhelming greenness.) Clovers and wildflowers. Yellow, orange, and red leaves. A sea of color. Nothing was different from what I experienced 100 days ago. (Except for everything else in this entry that I changed so far. My, am I on a roll today!)
The colorful luminescent sea led to a rather tall structure that sat far in the distance. A tall structure that looked even taller than before. Again, this was getting too predictable, having already experienced this before. And quite redundant. Every 100 entries, the tower’s a little bigger. We get it.
The tower looked like a skyscraper that a mermaid would live in. A luxuriously posh office building – for women. The coral accents ran up and down the gold-adorned structure. The diamond-studded glass had a pink tint to it. (Oh please! The designer can only think of the ladies, can’t she? Well, I never!) Towards the very top of the tower was the ocean floor, oddly suspended in the air. How all the water could retain its shape and not rain down from the sky was a mystery to me.
“A luxurious building,” I said to myself. “Can’t my Muse be any more original? But that water towards the top is weird. How can everything be underwater high in the sky?”
Let’s cut to the chase, and find out if this tower really is different.
I got attention of the same receptionist who sat there, typing 100 days back.
“So, is this the same Tower of Muses as before?” I asked her, just to make sure. (Oh, come on! You ask her that every single time! Shouldn’t you know the answer already?)
My Muse shook her head again and smiled. “No, silly! This tower is a little different. And there’s a teleporter thingy that will take you to the 1801st floor!”
I nodded, with a slight grin on my face. And this was mainly due to the deja vu. “And this floor is still…”
“Floor 1,” she recited. “ExperiMENTAL. Tee hee…”
And of course the Dark Muse, which was then a bad idea, was just beginning to affect my Muse at this time… (*sigh*) ”Thank you,” I told her, proceeding forward to the mysterious portal that sat past the white service desk just before the elevators.
Upon entering the portal, she was right. I entered a new room, which resembled a different lobby that was completely underwater. But this lobby had no exit, since this was the 1801st floor. Immediately, I used my One Privilege so that I could breathe underwater.
Approaching a coral colored service desk, I saw a different Muse sitting there. But she wasn’t typing. In fact, she looked up right after I got to this floor. It was only a split second that I saw her typing…
“Welcome, Kyle.” she announced. “You are on the “The Little Mermuse” floor. This floor is one of my favorites, since it captures who I am, 99 days ago…”
I nodded, and looked at the elevators that were past her desk. “I would like to go to floor 1900 now.”
At this, my Muse frowned. “Why? There are so many good floors!”
I advanced further to the elevators. I then sighed, and quite deliberately broke the fourth wall. The overly redundant redundancies have reached their limit for this post! Would you really want me to actually pick 6 to 8 random floors and stop on them? Sorry. It’s not going to happen this time, either. If you really wish to hear my discussion on the floors, you can visit any one of them by clicking on the links near the bottom of this post. Okay. If we don’t visit them, perhaps we should do this instead. I will briefly recap some of my favorite floors, after I have taken a few minutes to determine what they are.
There. After several minutes of reviewing all 99 entries, thinking and making a much needed edit over the older text, I have my list. It’s right here! I have it on my lap. Let’s see…I will put this in list form so that it will be easier for you to read. My favorite floors are:
Floor 1801 – The Little Mermuse
In this one, I see my Muse in her newest form. She has become a mermaid, ala Hans Christian Anderson’s famous tale. She makes a dramatic entrance and everything’s underwater. How does this saltwater story begin? Read it and find out. This is a “tail” that you won’t want to forget!
Floor 1811 – My Sister’s Wedding
In this one, I talk about what is one of the most important family days of all. My sister gets married and I serve as an usher in her wedding. It was a very happy day and a day that I won’t forget. Do you cry at weddings? If so, grab some tissues and read this one. You’ll be glad you did.
Floor 1824 – Greetings From Hubbard Lake!
Just another vacation post. After the fourth, I break to go up north. Just your standard vacation fare here. Pack your bags and read this one. Oh, and don’t forget the sunscreen.
Floor 1827 – Five Years and Counting
Has it really been five years that I’ve been doing Me & My Muse? Yes it has, and if you haven’t read an anniversary post, this one’s for you. Here’s to five years of this wonderful experiment. Read this entry and celebrate.
Floor 1836 – New Car Countdown – Part II: The LeSabre’s Last Stand
In the countdown to my new car, I bid my old ride one last goodbye. It’s not that I’m getting rid of it or anything. It will still be rode in the winter and every now and then. Don’t worry, black buddy. Your popularity will return when it gets cold. Buckle up and read this one. And hang on to your seats. It’s going to be a bumpy ride…
Floor 1838 – CamWHEEEEEEEE!!!
This is it. The much anticipated entry where I get a new car. A 2017 Toyota Camry XLE. She’s a beauty, and a lot of fun with her heated seats and roomy leather interior. Are you sold? Then buckle up and read this. And enjoy the climate control and whatever XM station you like.
Floor 1840– Wet Rainday
The Mermuse story arc continues, when Dark Muse takes control of my Muse. She is flashing bright with power. What did she drink? Was it something magical? Grab your scuba gear and read this. This one’s really deep.
Floor 1846 – SaturNESday
Besides the friend hangout, more of the story arc is explained here. Need a little more exposition? This one will help. Grab some popcorn and read this. The plot will make a lot more sense…
Floor 1855 – R.I.P. iPod…
This entry was initially written to lament my iPod that stopped working. But since I found out that it just got shorted, it works fine now, so this entry is nothing more than a joke. Not all iPods have extra lives but it appears that my iPod does. Read this one, and you’ll see how the first one was lost.
Floor 1864 – Halfway Point
The Mermuse saga continues when the Dark Muse comes back. What will be done now? How will the Dark Muse be stopped? What happens next? Read this one, and see how the plot thickens.
Floor 1870 – Farewell Toast
In this one, I bid farewell to Northwood University, the site where I experienced more than 10 years worth of Toastmasters meetings. From that point, the Northwood chapter ends, with a new one beginning soon. Read this one, and hear my last good-byes.
Floor 1873 – Friday Tidal Wave
In this one, you get a front row seat to the exciting finale of the Mermuse saga. Does the Dark Muse become victorious? Who can stop her? Grab your favorite snacks and read this one. It’s pretty exciting how it ends.
Floor 1884 – A New Toast
While the old chapter ends with Northwood, the new one now begins. In this one, I share how my Toastmasters club will now be meeting at Trinity Lutheran Church. Read this one to hear more about the new beginning.
Floor 1887 – Writing Weekend
It’s happening. An exciting new return to my desire to write. And with that comes a fun entry where I share my upcoming projects. What are these projects? There are actually three of them. Still curious? Read this entry and find out what they are.
Wow! It looks like I had less favorites than what I thought. I included a little less than last time! Maybe I should’ve added more to the list. But it’s too late now. Onward to the 1900th floor…
My Muse, having heard the whole conversation, grinned.
“It’s amazing how much you know about those floors!” she told me. “Especially since you haven’t even visited them…”
“Oh, I don’t need to…” I told her. “I lived them!”
To that, she responded with a satisfied nod, and I proceeded to the elevators. I then pressed the up button a few times. Where are the elevators? With this many, I would think that at least one would be ready for me! A few seconds later, I entered the first elevator door that opened. It just happened to be the one next to me.
I entered the elevator and pressed the 1900 button. Moments later, the doors closed.
Several moments passed. At this point, Kyle decided to be a little more unoriginal and once again reused some material from the previous milestone entry. Perhaps he’ll make it a little different so that they’ll never notice. Just enough changes to throw off the audience. How lazy of him! Can’t he get his brain thinking of any more original ideas? But Kyle would have none of that. He is just as determined to bring this nineteenth milestone post to an abrupt end. The good old recycled zinger. They’ll never notice! Unless the narrator reminds them…
Finally, moments later, the elevator arrived at the 1900th floor.
A little like the 1800th floor before it, this floor was an enormous room, lavishly decorated. A desk sat in one corner and a king-sized bed sat in the other, which was one fourth the size of the bed that was in Entry 1000. Pretty much the same room as the 1800th story, the 1700th story, the 1600th story, the 1500th story, the 1400th story, the 1300th story, the 1200th story, the 1100th story, the 900th story, the 800th story, the 700th story, the 600th story, the 500th story, the 400th story, the 300th story, the 200th story, and the 100th story before it, only the room was the same size as the 1800th story, 1700th story,1600th story, 1500th story, 1400th story, 1300th story, 1200th story, 1100th story, 900th story, 800th story, 700th story, 600th story, 500th story, 400th story, and 300th story and the bed was light blue.
Oh! We agreed not to meddle with the following paragraph! As much as we want to, we can’t. It just wouldn’t be right…
And on the bed laid my Muse. She was in her mermaid form and fast asleep, with a note attached to her. It didn’t surprise me that she was sleeping, considering that creating this tower probably took so much out of her. Now I’m going to guess that the note will mention that the computer in this room will have this entry already typed. That even includes the later parts that you haven’t seen yet! Am I right? And this further adds to the redundancies that exist in this post already!
Attached to her hand was a note. And this is what it said:
To my master,
I made this tower for you and me. This is to honor your hard work and dedication for another 100 days of hardship, bringing the total up to 1900. Thank you for your dedication to keeping this project going daily. If you look at your computer, the last entry is already written. I am still forever grateful to your kindness, your dedication to saving me and your gratitude.
I then looked next to the bed and noticed a directory which was much like the 1800th floor, the 1700th floor, the 1600th floor, the 1500th floor, the 1400th floor, the 1300th floor, the 1200th floor, the 1100th floor, the 1000th floor, the 900th floor, the 800th floor, the 700th floor, the 600th floor, the 500th floor, the 400th floor, the 300th floor, the 200th floor, and the 100th floor before it. However, this was the directory for the Tower of Muses, only it covered only the next 100 floors. I looked at the directory.
The Tower of Muses – Directory – Floors 1801-1900
Floor 1801 – The Little Mermuse Floor 1802 – Almost Friday… Floor 1803 – Finish Line Floor 1804 – Quiet Day at Home Floor 1805 – Happy Father’s Day! Floor 1806 – Wedding Week Floor 1807 – More Meetings Floor 1808 – Busy Day Floor 1809 – Wedding Rehearsal Floor 1810 – Wedding Eve Floor 1811 – My Sister’s Wedding Floor 1812 – Wedding Leftovers Floor 1813 – Happy Work Day Floor 1814 – Crazy about Cars Floor 1815 – Time for a NESday… Floor 1816 – And then there was One… Floor 1817 – Hot Finale Floor 1818 – Summer Post Done Quick Floor 1819 – Fiscal New Year’s Day Floor 1820 – A Short Week Floor 1821 – Fourth of July Eve Floor 1822 – Happy Independence Day! Floor 1823 – Leftover Fireworks Floor 1824 – Greetings From Hubbard Lake! Floor 1825 – Back Home… Floor 1826 – Sushi – For Realz This Time! Floor 1827 – Five Years and Counting Floor 1828 – Awesome Program Floor 1829 – Brain Freeze: Part VI Floor 1830 – Pre-Approved Floor 1831 – Not Quite… Floor 1832 – My New Ride Floor 1833 – End of the Weekend… Floor 1834 – New Car Stuff Floor 1835 – New Car Countdown Floor 1836 – New Car Countdown – Part II: The LeSabre’s Last Stand Floor 1837 – Car Get! Floor 1838 – CamWHEEEEEEEE!!! Floor 1839 – Tired… Floor 1840 – Wet Rainday Floor 1841 – Cereal Trip and More Car Stuff Floor 1842 – Here We Go… Floor 1843 – WedNESday Floor 1844 – Long-awaited Bible Study Floor 1845 – Journals of Yesterday Floor 1846 – SaturNESday Floor 1847 – And the rest of the Weekend… Floor 1848 – A Shorter Week… Floor 1849 – Halfway Point Floor 1850 – Chip off the New Windshield Floor 1851 – The Weekend is Here Floor 1852 – Greetings From Hubbard Lake! Floor 1853 – Greetings From Hubbard Lake! Part Two Floor 1854 – Back Home… Floor 1855 – R.I.P. iPod… Floor 1856 – Another Toastmasters Meeting Floor 1857 – Brown Haircut and Coming Attractions Floor 1858 – Weekend Eve Floor 1859 – The Weekend is Here… Floor 1860 – Early Training is Early… Floor 1861 – Happy Birthday! Floor 1862 – Birthday Aftermath Floor 1863 – Hot Potluck Floor 1864 – Halfway Point Floor 1865 – Plenty of Cake and a Friend Visit? Floor 1866 – Hooray for Friday! Floor 1867 – Saturday Summer Palooza Floor 1868 – Dinner at Wixom Lake Floor 1869 – Spicy Dinner Floor 1870 – Farewell Toast Floor 1871 – Next Day Done Quick Floor 1872 – Thaiing up Thursday Floor 1873 – Friday Tidal Wave Floor 1874 – What to do… Floor 1875 – Last Week of Summer Floor 1876 – Monday Monsoon Floor 1877 – Clean Bathroom Floor 1878 – Two Day Countdown Floor 1879 – Bible Study Floor 1880 – Labor Day Weekend? Writing Time! Floor 1881 – Clean Room and Fuji Fun Floor 1882 – The Countdown Begins Floor 1883 – Happy Birthborday! Floor 1884 – A New Toast Floor 1885 – Coming Attractions Floor 1886 – Cooling Down Floor 1887 – Writing Weekend Floor 1888 – Writing Weekend – Part II Floor 1889 – Lots of Progress Floor 1890 – Short Monday Floor 1891 – A Day That I Still Never Forget Floor 1892 – Tired Wednesday Floor 1893 – Work and a Toastmasters Meeting Floor 1894 – Young Adult Night Floor 1895 – Writing Time Floor 1896 – A Little Housekeeping… Floor 1897 – A Good Case of the Monday’s Floor 1898 – Open up and Say AHHHHHHHH!!!!! Floor 1899 – Super Early Meeting Floor 1900 – Tower of Muses: The Nineteenth Ascent
The high today is going to be 74 degrees and the silver lining is having this 1900th post made.
To all of you who have ever completed a major milestone, I hope that you all have a fantastic day.
Just like entry 1800, she’s right! The entire entry is typed! And there’s that message at the end! Aw…How cute. I don’t understand how a narrator got into my post. Oh well…
Now I’ll…What’s going on? Just like before! It’s happening once again! On the bed! My Muse is flashing…