I’m sure that every one of us can think of a time when mom made a special meal for us. Mom always did it best, and that’s what made it taste good. But times have changed since then. You have to make the meal now. Either you or your spouse. One of you has to make it.
Today, I am willing to take on that task without hesitation….
Muse: Blah blah blah. Another one? Yesterday’s post only had 5 viewers!
You see? There WAS an audience after all….
Muse: Fine. So….Whacha talking about today?
I’m going to cook a dinner tonight….
Muse: Hee hee hee hee! YOU? COOK? That is SO hilarious!
I wouldn’t criticize my cooking. I’ve done it before. It’s not too hard.
Muse: So, what’s it going to be, cook? Gourmet McDonald’s, Taco Bell Ala King, or that oh-so-delicious $8 deep dish pizza?
None of the above. And for the record, I get it less than $8 with my employee discount, thank you very much!
Muse: Fine then! Is it going to be one of those cardboard TV dinners? Just stop, before I wet myself!
You have already, in one of the earlier episodes….
Muse: Hey! Why did you have to bring that up again?
I didn’t. You did. And you’re wrong. No cardboard TV dinner.
Muse: Then what’s it gonna be, Le Chef?
Tonight’s menu will consist of Spam grilled cheese sandwiches, tomato soup, corn and strawberry shortcake for dessert.
Muse: You’re probably gonna burn the grilled cheese sandwiches! Tee hee! It’s gonna be so funny!
You doubt my cooking prowess? I think you’re mistaking. You would end up burning them….
Muse: No I wouldn’t!
Everyone. She really is a bad cook. I have had her food before, and it all tastes awful!
Muse: My cooking is amazing! You’re making all of this up!
What about the chicken breast that you gave me last night? That was pure burnt-to-a-crisp perfection right there!
Muse: When did you take that?
After you gave it to me. I never ate a single piece. I took the picture and threw it all away. Besides, I was already full with my meal from McDonald’s….
Muse: But that was one mistake! I really am good at cooking!
You’re really good at burning food to a crisp, okay? Do you want me to show them any more of your “experiments”?
Muse: You don’t have them!
I do, and I’ll show them all, master cook extraordinaire.
Muse: Waaaaah! I hate you! You always do this to me! Waaaaah!
I can’t lie, everyone. The truth hurts, and my muse isn’t a very good cook.
Today, it’s going to be pretty warm. The silver lining will consist of the usual. Being able to read more of The Postmortal and edit more of my story. And for the record, I’ll let you know how my meal turns out, so check back later for that.
To all of you who miss mom’s home cooking, I hope you all have a fantastic day.
Muse: Hmph! I’ll show him! I’ll make the PERFECT MEAL! And I WON’T burn it this time!